Art + Life
I have every intention and desire to write on this trip. Reflection, Integration, Insight are big pieces of my nature and of what gives me meaning and joy. I’ve found myself frustrated at not writing—like the trip was being wasted—until I remembered a comment by the French-Cuban essayist and memoirist Anais Nin (with whom I had an obsessive fascination about 15 years ago): I cannot both Write and Live. Nin either Wrote or she Lived. Both took up her entire being and attention, demanded different capacities from her and offered different fulfillment.
The day to day living on the first leg of our trip took up my energy and ability to write. (More on the surprising constancy of logistics and its sister, decision fatigue, later.)
There has been little time or energy for reflection until now (Day 6) and that, for me, prevented half of what creates bone deep satisfaction: Art is integral to Living.
Ironically, before we decided to embark on this trip and move, I felt I was not fully engaging in Life. I was painting, I was meditating, I was strategizing, I was talking. There was a whisper again and again: Write. Write. Just because You Want To. But it didn’t feel like I was Living. It felt like I was holding back, almost like staying inside while a gaggle of other kids played in the summer twilight, laughing, running and skinning their knees. It felt like I wasn’t willing to skin my knee.
Ideally, this blog would be in relatively real time. Realistically, it will not be. It will be reflection. It will attempt not just to share but to derive meaning: meaning from the willingness to skin my knees on Life.
I invite you to walk with me on this journey. I will be blogging about our travel, our transition and its teachings. To receive posts by email, sign up below.